Monday, 1 April 2013

Caring and not caring

Recently, we popped in to see a photography exhibition about children with Downs syndrome. And it was really good, artistically as well as in a way that just makes you think.

Of course I am infinitely happy that my child was born healthy and doesn't have any syndromes that I'm aware of. But I like to think that happiness is only for her sake. Knowing how much I love her, and loved her before meeting her, there's nothing that could have stopped my happiness.

Before getting pregnant it's not something I would have thought of, that idea of not caring. I suppose being alone I was bound to be self absorbed, I still cared about some false image of perfection, in the eyes of others. But the thing about being a parent is that the only thing you really truly care about above anything else is your child. Everything else, whatever syndromes or illnesses attach themselves along the way, whatever anyone else thinks or says, could never even scrape the sides of my love for her. Its the most liberating feeling, to not care about stupid things, and it seems to only happen when you start to care about something, or someone, significant.